How long should we wash our hands?
And while we’re at it,
How many angles in “Heaven”?
Just to keep things moving,
Five.
Dear little Ameise,
How tiny you look today.
Why I would even say
You have shrunk
To the size of an ant.
What do you call your monkeys?
Those two,
The ones you put diapers on
And turned them loose
In the sunroom.
The sun got angry,
After it asked you nicely
To let it play with the monkeys
But you didn’t trust it,
And for good reason.
It burned the house down.
The monkeys ran for it, helter skelter.
But you continued to watch your golf tournament
Throughout the mayhem,
Spooning down your Dream Whip
Somehow managing to survive.
But I still want to know,
Where is the crayon sharpener?
Where is the end of this?
How long should we wash our hands?
—Gary Lindorff