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Jeff Sessions, Jesus Christ and Reefer Madness

Gnome Takes Axe to Drug War Reform

         Cotton was short and the weeds were tall.
         But Mr Roosevelt was gonna save us all. ...
         Momma got sick and daddy got down.
         The county got the farm and they moved to town.
         Papa got a job with the TVA.
         He bought a washing machine, then a Chevrolet. ...
         Song o’ the south.
         Sweet potato pie and shut my mouth.
         Stonewall and Gone With the Wind.
         Ain’t nobody lookin’ back again.

As the cannabis gently eases the attorney general’s mind deeper into his sub-conscious, a prayer of longing rises from the depths: Please help me, Lord. I long to be back home in the great state of Alabama. Lord, deliver me from this demon city and the forces of darkness that so frighten me. Alabama’s nostalgic lyrics remind Mr. Sessions of the hard times and that class traitor FDR who saved so many people. Of course, this was before things got better, the good times came, money started rolling in and Richard Nixon’s Southern Strategy opened the way for Republicans like Mr. Sessions to be prosecutors and senators. It seems God and Jesus Christ shifted their politics somewhere along the way. We're told at one point Mr. Sessions advocated making a second conviction for the sale of marijuana a capital crime, which meant the state of Alabama would be able to kill someone for selling marijuana, a substance now perfectly legal in the capital city of this great nation, where members of the three august branches of our government now rule by throwing rotten vegetables at each other.

Mr. Sessions would take us back to the halcyon days of mandatory minimum sentences and a host of other draconian features of our troubled criminal justice system. It's how we do it back home, how we'll Make America Great Again. Back to a time when God-fearing white folks figured out how to stigmatize African Americans as felons so they could mass-incarcerate them instead of lynching them. At least that’s what Michelle Alexander tells us in her book The New Jim Crow.



story | by Dr. Radut